sad

I made 6 batches of cookies today. My intake was 3 and a half cookies and half a glass of milk. I made a ton of cookies to bring to my fiancees place tomorrow for halloween.

The more I think about us the more I know we aren't gonna work out and now I'm more depressed than ever. I'm gonna try to make halloween really fun for both of us. Then I'm gonna see if he has time to talk on sunday. I'm nervous and sad and scared. I'm gonna try not to drink tomorrow too. He doesn't like when I drink. I just feel sooo lost right now. what can I do???

So the lowest I got from the fast was 140. I wanted it to be 139. I think I'm gonna do a series of 2 day fast for the next few weeks. 3 days spikes my anxiety and I almost confessed what I was doing to my mom. It was rediculous.