anger

My internet is broken again. That really pisses me off. I'm at a friends place right now. I spent the night because I got pretty drunk. I had 6 grapefruit palm bays. Earlier that day I had a mini taco. I feel pretty empty and hung over right now. The empty thing is nice... hung over not so much. I haven't weighed myself today because I'm here not home and the scale here is like 10 years old and always has things on it so I'm sure it probably wouldn't be accurate.

I had a really nice work out yesterday. It was short because I haven't had a work out in a long time but I did 10 minutes on the eliptical, 5 minutes on the bike (I want a nice butt, mine is very very flat), 5 minutes doing crunches, and only one set of 10 on this weight machine thing for my arms. That one was pretty intense so I'm just gonna try to build up my strength without straining myself lol. I'm hoping to do it again today and more if I don't feel so weak this time. It will more than likely end up coming out the same though because I'm so hung over.

The fiancee and I are back into trouble. We aren't getting along at all. Why can't we just be made for each other?? He invited me to come over today but unless he texts or calls I'm not gonna go. We had a fight last night (again) and as much as it got me thinking I think it got to him too. I left in a huff and usually he would yell at me out the door but yesterday he started and then just gave up. I don't really know what that means but I guess i'll have to wait and see.

The friends I was drinking with yesterday are mutual friends of ours and one of the people I know best in the group told me that if we broke up he would take my fiancees side. That hurt. I appreciate the honesty though. I think everyone in this house would do the same thing but are too much of pussy's to say anything. They are all supposed to move in together at the end of the month. So basically if he breaks up with me I'm never gonna see that close group of people. I think I'm going to have to start looking for a new social network to soften that blow. Or maybe I shouldn't and just stay alone for awhile so I can focus on my weight loss goals. I just want all my fucking fat gone.